GERMS ARE YOUR FRIEND

germ

It appears to me that in the past decade people have become more germaphobic, insistently  washing their hands and not touching any unclean items. People using paper towels to touch door knobs, avoiding hand-shakes, brushing teeth more than three times per day, and avoiding public bathrooms are in my opinion going way too far to avoid my friend, the germ. Germaphobics are doing everything possible to avoid the common germ when we in fact should be embracing them. People think they can keep from getting sick by avoiding germs at any cost. These people usually get yearly flu shots, wear protective sterile latex gloves, and even the extreme will wear those protective paper face masks during flu season. Those masks always make me think that an end-of-the-world virus has broken out…I’ve seen too many movies. I have been fortunate in that besides getting a cold once-a-year I never have been sick with the flu or any other virus. It’s not that I’m in great shape as I’m constantly reminded when I look in the mirror. There is nothing supernatural about me, I just go by a opposite theory of germaphobes. My theory is this: let certain amounts of germs enter your body throughout your life and you will build up antibodies that will fight off future germs or diseases. I learned this from a taxi driver in Vegas, not a great source, but it made sense. Just as the flu shot puts a small amount of the flu virus into your body to help your defense system build antibodies to fight off future flu bugs, letting small amounts of germs in your body has the same effect on fighting off future viruses. This is called the GIT, germ ingestive theory. You occassionally eat some food off the ground, don’t wash your hands before eating, never avoid touching anything such as sink handles, eat some food which has expired fairly recently, and come in contact with sick people. It is also known as the LAZY theory because you basically cut out all the steps that germaphobes go through, it’s just easier. I have no medical facts to back me up, just a rambling, slightly incoherent, taxi driver from Las Vegas who thinks that the great majority of humankind will be destroyed by 2015 due to a new strain of virus. The only survivors will be cockroaches and people from the 3rd world as they have built up defense systems that can handle germ invasion. I tipped the taxi driver and began my life of seeing germs as my savior from mass destruction, well at least from getting sick.

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